Maternity Clothes Part Deux and Overwhelmed

I seriously thought I was handling this whole pregnancy thing pretty well....until yesterday.

I thought that I was doing a great job not being super emotional, and before I got pregnant I swore up and down that I would not be that hormonal crazy bitch that some women tend to turn into during pregnancy.

Well I wouldn't go too far and say that I am a crazy hormonal bitch, but I am a tad bit overwhelmed and I have been in denial about it for a while.

It all became clear to me yesterday when Nate and I we're shopping for some pregnancy jeans.

I was told that Goodwill and Snowline Hospice have a great maternity section over here in Folsom.
I knew it was going to rain this week and my jeans can no longer handle the ponytail extender idea, so in the 3rd quarter of the Ravens game Nate and I left to go shopping. (Thank god we did because the Ravens were really shitty this week and it would of been torture to sit and watch the rest of the game.)

Smart idea at the time but being almost 25 weeks, which is 6 months, it's not quite cutting it anymore.

We went to Goodwill and Snowline Hospice and they have a maternity section, but it sucks! I decided that unless I want to look like a homeless person we better start looking else where. Now, I don't mind looking like a homeless person at home, but unfortunately I have a job where I have to be out in the weather, rain or shine, so I don't quite have the option to run around looking like I just walked out of Skid Row.

I did find one GAP maternity sweater from Snowline Hospice and it was only $4.04 with tax, but for the amount of gas we spent driving around we we're just better off hitting the department stores.

We then went to the local mall and went to all the major department stores. I began getting frustrated because we kept getting told the same thing. "We don't carry maternity anymore, but we have a great selection online."

We then went to JCPenney and I thought, "OK they have to have a maternity section here." We then asked a nice lady who was folding clothes where their maternity section was and she replied, "We don't carry maternity anymore, but we have a great selection online." Uh Oh....

I then lost it. My eyes swelled up with tears and I said, "I don't understand how you buy maternity jeans online when you've never been pregnant. I need to try them on! I am fat now and things don't fit the same at all!" Nathan then grabbed my hand and led me out of the store so I wouldn't continue my meltdown in front of the poor lady. She did however feel really bad, and said, "I know its tough and I'm so sorry and if I had it my way we would still carry it." What a nice sales associate and you could tell she felt really bad. I was also super proud of Nate because he knew that I was really upset and he just let me be, which is what I needed in that moment.

We then, out of desperation, tried Sears and thank god they had a maternity section that carried actual maternity jeans. They were even having a sale of buy one get one free so, I got each pair of pants for about 23.99 and a pair of yoga/sweatpants that were on clearance. Thank goodness.

All the swag I got. Three pairs of pants and an awesome sweater.

I then on my way home realized that I have been feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed with the idea that Lincoln is coming. I then began telling Nathan all my fears and began saying things like, what if Lincoln hates me, what if the room isn't done, what if you lose your job and then we're poor. On and on I went for about 5 minutes.

Nathan then looked at me and said, "What if we have the best baby ever."

I then got the point. I had been filling my head with so much negativity lately that I have not even been giving all the positive, great things in my life any room to flourish and grow.

So, here is my list of things that in reality are true and not what if's:
1. My husband is completely and utterly awesome. We have been together just about for 10 years and we are now having a baby. Thanks to his awesomeness and work ethic, we are completely prepared for this as a couple emotionally, financially, and we have so much love between ourselves there is no way Lincoln could feel not loved.

2. My pets are awesome. When we first got Sheila she was a hot freaking mess, but through months of training she has finally become manageable and we did all of this without hiring a trainer. She doesn't eat walls or the remote anymore, she knows sit, stay, come and lay down, she can be walked on a leash for the most part, does fantastic when off a leash, is not aggressive, and will not be in your face anymore when we eat food. She does still like to jump on people, but if that is my only problem then I have it made.

She seriously is so much better.

3. I have started to take pictures of my belly frequently because it's important to Nate and decided I will be a good sport about it. Plus, people love seeing my belly.

Me rockin' my new jeans and taken yesterday afternoon.

 4. I love my baby and as long as he is loved, fed, clothed, has diapers, and put to sleep he will be happy.

~Julia